I figure for my first post I would dive right in and give you a real glimpse of my thoughts.
I feel that more women actually have this internal argument than they are willing to admit. After my divorce, this was pretty much a no brainer. I wanted sex! You know the kind I am talking about hot, dirty, sweaty pig sex.
Oh man, did I find it!
Wow, I had forgotten how much fun sex could be when you don’t have the relationship crap attached to it.
After a few months, my brain started asking questions about this man that made my vagina so happy. Yes, he was good with his tongue, his fingers, and his dick. However, we had no other real connection.
My friends have labeled him as the “Fuck boy.” This on again off again sexual relationship has lasted longer than either of us expected and not because we belong together but because we can equally meet each other’s sexual needs.
This works because I am honest with him about my feelings. I have made it very clear that this works because we are not committed to each other. I am not saying we don’t get mad at each other. There are times when we can’t meet up because real life gets in the way. The key here is HONESTY. I know that’s a scary word, but it really is the best practice.
We have taken breaks because of emotions. About six months ago I took a step back from “Fuck boy” because I was reevaluating what I wanted. I dated a few men, but most could not handle my brutal truth. Yes, it’s very direct and can be intimidating.
I was on this date with this guy. I had a great connection with the exception of his humor as the night went on became very childish. At the end of the night, he came in for a nightcap. My brain was having this freak out session because I was not that into this guy, but my vagina was having a moment of it’s a man with a dick lets see if it works.
Then, it hit me, I was horny. I had not been laid in a while. Trying that whole let’s not have sex thing until all the connections meet. I sent this man home told him that I was not going to sleep with him. I enjoy are dated, but it didn’t go any further than that.
After multiple internal arguments, I caved and gave into my sexual urges. Queue Fuck boy. This was another one of the honest conversations. Rules and guidelines, we are both free to see other people.
No, the sex isn’t as often as it was, but it’s still just as satisfying as before. It’s a release of the stress of life and allows me to make better decisions when I evaluating who I want to give my time, my heart, and my energy too.
Brain knows that it’s time to find a stimulating relationship that hits all of my needs mental, emotionally, and sexually. But in the meantime, when rubbing it out isn’t enough, I know fuck boy will get the job done.